Regroup, Review, Refresh, Re-Center

Sometimes I lose focus of the fact that it's ok to do things just for me. I mean, I work hard and take care of my responsibilities, so I should have time for self-amusement, right? I have also spent a lot of my life looking after others, so I don't really owe anyone anything. Heh. And yet I so often feel as if I have to be "helping" somebody. Not enough Karma in the bank?

I have to convince myself that it's ok if I do some stuff just for me. In fact, the world can get along very well without my attention, a fact that is both liberating and a little depressing for someone with the "help" gene. Ah, but balance in all things.

It is at this time of year that I tend to feel as if I'm swimming in oatmeal no matter what I do. I don't know why. The days are growing longer and there is the promise of Spring, if not yet any indication that it's actually out there somewhere. Delayed reaction to not enough light? SAD. I don't know. Could be. Or perhaps just the knowledge that promises can be broken and doodoo happens? Especially in this time of weather anomolies. Is spring something I can really count on? I guess I won't know for sure until the patches of snow are getting hard to find and that unmistakable odour of thawing dog poo assails my nostrils on an otherwise refreshing, warm Spring breeze. Only then will I know that Spring is truly at hand.

In the meantime, I'm a person who makes things and I think I should be doing some of that. I'm supposed to making jam right now. I have the fruit right here. I forgot to buy sugar. Again. *sigh* Can't make jam without sugar... at least, not this kind. This is the second time I've forgotten to buy sugar when I knew I'd be needing to make jam. Brain!! Why do you abandon me??!!

It seems to be preoccupied with pointless ponderings. My brain that is. Doesn't matter what I think anyway. Not really. So why don't I turn off the ponderings and try to remember why I left the house when I go shopping?

"Of what use is a philosopher who doesn't hurt anybody's feelings?" — Diogenes of Sinope

An internet friend put this on his status today. Of what use is a philosopher at all? Nevermind one that wounds. A chronic ponderer fares no better. So hey, time to regroup, review, refresh, re-center, re-everything, I think. May also be time to start a new blog. I mean, let's be realistic: a few thoughtful, depressing poems will take care of these dark feelings, right? And nobody reads poetry anymore either. The poetry book is over on that unused shelf next to the book of philosophy. So it's purely a carthartic exercise. Then I should move on... to SOMETHING I LIKE TO DO. No, I'm not threatening to blog the dark oatmeal pondering poems. Yes. I am thinking of starting a new blog on things I like to do. :) Stay tuned. ;o)

I did it. Yes I did. :) http://quillingartandmore.blogspot.com/